Highly appreciated friends:
Making necessary reflections on our particular, individual, inner psychological work, I send you some considerations that will probably help us, let us see:
SELF-OBSERVATION WILL SAVE US
It is unfortunate that within our studies many people feel and think that they are very good.
This leads us to the conclusion that many companions, men and women, do not know how to handle self-observation well and, consequently, they allow themselves to be dragged by the good “I’s” and end up considering themselves to be very good or excellent people.
This belief of believing ourselves to be very good can burn us at any moment. We have seen companions who always said ‘YES’ to each and everyone’s request. They have always felt good and surely there is a noble part in all of them, but in many cases there are more ”I’s” than true goodness, as we have seen.
What happens then? Well, simply that these persons feel good because when acting they are apparently so, but if they do not self-observe thoroughly they will not consciously perceive that these actions do not have an unconditional or truly conscious foundation. However, when we are bottled up, we will always think that, actually, we are indeed aware of that and of all our states and thoughts.
Unfortunately, if we are not able to meditate, reflect and know why we do things, if our actions only seek something in return or are voluntary sufferings or acts of a selfless kind, if we do not take into account all these factors we will be a prey to the inner Beast and to the tenebrous ones. If we are not able to see and understand our good “I’s” sooner or later we will get burned. Why? Well, simply because these aggregates are very subtle and they like to do things in order to feel good or for others to see us as being good, for them to see us as special, sacrificed, but deep down all of that will always pursue an interest. That is how good “I’s” are… These “I’s” are very dangerous to us, not to others. Therein lies why they are so very subtle and really dangerous.
The good “I’s” make us see a side of ourselves that in reality does not exist, it is not true. What happens then? Well, by always saying “YES” to everything even if deep down we do not want it, or maybe saying “YES” out of fears, or because we believe that we are working on ourselves, well we end up filling ourselves with frustrations, bitterness, impotence, etc., etc., etc. This is why true self-observation, reflection, meditation will be our salvation.
Why do we end up getting burned on the path? Because after the good “I’s” make us feel that we are good, we will never understand that others do see our crude reality in us, because the reality is different, but we do not manage to see it and the serious thing is that we come to think that others are not perceiving us. And since we will be convinced that we are very good, we will never accept what others see in us or what some who do know about Gnostic psychology see.
In this way we are distancing ourselves from our companions, from our friends, because the “I” of pride will make us believe that they are notappreciating us. Self-pity will fill our heads with bad thoughts and bad feelings toward all those who do see us. The worst thing is when we are not able to observe our thoughts and our feelings, because in that case we will be very full of ourselves.
Wanting to abandon the path, or our institution –AGEAC– or not following the guidelines of the International Coordination, is the goal of the inner Beast and of the tenebrous ones. We will end up becoming that unpleasant creature that appears in the film THE LORD OF THE RINGS, which they have called GOLLUM, because our psyche will be atrophied. Regrettably, we only use our mind to offer arguments and explanations, but never to go beyond our false reality.
And if we follow this path like this we will die physically and in that case we will place on our tombstone: “Here lies a good person who was not understood”,as if it were that we are all Cosmocrators…
Finally, I add a few sentences to be reflected upon:
“It is necessary to live in order to die psychologically!”
“The good one, when corrupted, becomes terrible.”
Saint Gregory the Great
“The egoist has his heart in his head.”
“Not to be good more than to oneself is not to be good at all.”
“The only acceptable selfishness is to ensure that everyone is well so as to feel better ourselves.”
PACTA SUNT SERVANDA.
“Pacts must be fulfilled.”
KWEN KHAN KHU